Thursday, November 5, 2009

Big Step

Generally, when I am confronted about the things that I write in blogs, I retract my statements and apologize.  I am finally learning to stand up for myself and stand by what I think and feel.  I choose my words very carefully, but I have always had trouble with how I am perceived, and when called out on it, I tend to play the victim.  Not this time!  This is a huge step for me, and I feel so relieved.  

This is MY struggle, through MY hip surgery, and I am allowed to feel angry, sad, and scared.  I am allowed to replay the events of the past and come to terms with what has happened.   It is a process, and once it is complete, these feelings will be gone, but for now, it is real, and it is something I face every single day.   

I do not blame anyone for what has happened, but there are still thoughts and experiences that I have to work through to answer why this happened and how to prevent it from happening again.  

I am just a broken athlete trying to pick up the pieces.

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