Reflections on the last 1.5 years

Now that I have some semblance of a future, I am starting to reflect on the recent past.  I couldn't have imagined all the things that happened to me since graduating from Michigan, and it has been an enlightening experience.  I've learned to make smart decisions about my future.  I've learned that I never want to apply for a job through craigslist again.  I am so glad that I did not go straight to graduate school because these experiences provided me with a truly unique perspective that I would not have otherwise:

-The Startup.  It took awhile for the bitterness to wear off, but finally, about 3 months after the layoff, I began looking back at this experience fondly.  I know I will be back at a startup someday, as I really miss working at a place that came home with me every night.  I miss the gritty, risky, get-your-hands-dirty nature.  I miss being a part of something and feeling truly committed to what I am doing.

-The Layoff.  I always thought I would be exempt from these things.  I am smart, well-educated, had outstanding grades, and I work really hard.  But so do a lot of people.  And in many cases, that doesn't matter.  A lot of getting laid off is pure bad luck, and this taught me to make smarter decisions about my career path and to be understanding of other people's situations.  Learn a skill.   Shed a tear for the state of Michigan.

-The Pro Bike Racer Thing.  I chuckled re-reading my personal statement: "After my layoff, I spent the rest of the year attempting to become a professional bicycle racer."  In this chapter, I justified mopping floors and being broke in the name of bike racing.  What I didn't realize at the beginning, though, was that I would really miss being challenged.   I also learned some really sad things about human character.  It was shocking to see how quickly people gave up on me after my injury.  That is ok, though, because it forced me to not give up on myself.  

-The Work 4 Jobs and Go It Alone Thing.  This last chunk has also been interesting.   I'm learning that I am talented, that I can be a good coach, and that I am qualified to do marketing and personal training.  I can build a small coaching business on my own, and I can do better than I did at an established company.  I can't let other people shatter my confidence and hold me back from reaching my potential.  I can be many things and still be good at them.   I became a coach because it is something that I love to do, and it doesn't have to be more than that.  I am a better coach/personal trainer if it is a hobby, not a full-time profession, because I am not limited by finances.  I can lower rates, access more clients, and truly help people, which is why I do it. 

This has all been a lesson in accepting things that I cannot control.  I am trying to accept these experiences for what they were without dwelling on the negative aspects of them.  Now that I have defined things to look forward to, this is much easier.