at home

I came home to Cleveland for a few days so that I could move some of my non-essential stuff.

I went through all of my things in Ann Arbor, and I sorted it into piles of things that I really need and things that I might need. Everything else I am getting rid of. I want to fit all of my really need stuff in one car load, which I think is possible. I may have to ship a box or two, but that won't be so bad.

Everyone moved out of my house at school, and it is sad. I didn't have anything else to do today, so I randomly drove home. When I got home, I went to dinner with my parents at this Thai restaurant where all the food was really bland. Tomorrow, my dad is off because it's Wednesday and he takes every Wednesday off. We need to go to the bike shop because I broke my rear Zipp at the Madison crit. It isn't horribly broken, but the carbon cracked a little bit. So sad, but at least they were old. Plus, now Erin is sending me his sweet Reynolds wheels to use at nationals which I will probably break in the crit but whatever.

Riding has been going well. Yesterday I rode 40 miles with Mattison and Matt. They towed me around most of the time because I was really tired from the 85 mile ride. We still averaged 20, though, and we took a nice route home. I haven't ridden on Werkner since I was a little Freshman when Marcus towed me around and made me suffer for what felt like an eternity. It's nice to revisit these areas and see that there are nice roads in Ann Arbor. Too bad I'm finding this out so close to the end.

I took today off, but I will get some nice hill riding in tomorrow and Thursday before I head back to Ann Arbor. Not too much volume, though, because I've had enough of that for this week and nationals isn't too far away. I also think that I sprained my left ankle slightly. It's been hurting for about a week, and it still hurts. It doesn't really hurt while I ride, though. Just when I bend it.

A Michigan Alum?

Yesterday was graduation.  It is strange being completely done with college.  The ceremony was nice on the Diag.  I think it actually made the experience more unique considering that we are the only class to ever graduate on the Diag.  I think my dad was a little bummed that it wasn't in Michigan stadium.  He's seen a lot of graduations at OSU, and I think he was looking forward to seeing one here.  Oh well.

My parents only stayed Friday night.  We went to Ypsilanti to see the famous water tower.  We almost played putt putt in Ypsi, but it was closed. 

After my parents left yesterday, I did some hill repeat intervals.  Today I rode 85 miles with Doug, DP and George.  We averaged ~19 mph, and I felt really good at the end.  We were sprinting down Scio Church.

So...what do I do now?

I finished my last exam yesterday, and I am now officially done with undergrad.  

Also, despite feeling like I really messed up my econ final, I actually got 2 standard deviations above the mean and secured an A in the class (1 SD above is an A).  Now I just have to wait for the rest of my grades which should be As.  Highest distinction? High distinction? What will it be?

I have a few weeks with nothing to really do.  I can start throwing stuff away as I prepare to move across the country.  I can try to find a job where I get to play in the forest all day.  I can try to find a cycling team so I can race my bicycle all day.  Right now, though, I'm really tired, and I think I'll need a little break from bike racing after nationals.  

Regionals took a lot out of me.  Monday I went on a ride with Kristen.  She thinks she is slow, but I assure you, she is not.  Yesterday I didn't ride, and today I did an easy spin.

I decided to venture onto some dirt roads outside Ann Arbor today.  These are really hit or miss, and today was a little bit of both.  I went out Whitmore Lake to Joy.  Joy was much better than it was in the fall when I rode it with John.  Much less gravel and it was actually pretty smooth.  Then I rolled through Dexter to Parker and finally to Liberty.  Liberty was not a nice dirt road.  On some sections, it was so bumpy, and my arms were vibrating so much that they went numb and I felt like I could have easily lost my grip and fallen into a pit of dirt and gravel.  Luckily, this didn't happen, and I made it home 25 miles later with a little more dirt on my bike than there was before.  It was a nice ride because I physically went easy, but it was a mental challenge on the dirt to choose the right lines, stay focused, and not get scared.

Oh Frustration

I think I'm too hard on myself.

The races this weekend were ok.  I got 5th in the road race, we won the TTT, and I got like 15th in the crit.  In the road race, I wasted too much energy on the first lap and my legs were pretty zapped for the second half of the race.  It was also the longest road race I've ever done (50 miles).  I was in a group of 6 with three Indiana riders who wouldn't do any work.  I ended up pulling into the finish and 2 of them passed me.

For the TTT, I was feeling really tired and I thought we were doing horribly because Julie had to keep slowing down for me.  Somehow, though, we won.  This is very surprising to me.

The crit didn't go quite as well.  I'm not used to riding in such big fields, and I got nervous.  It started out fine, I was in the front and everything was great.  Then I slipped back a little bit and couldn't work my way back up.  I eventually got a flat and had to take a free lap.  I tried to ride my bike around to the wheel pit, but my rear flat tire didn't like that idea.  I started to slide out and I couldn't turn any more.  I think I cut some people off because they yelled at me later, but I was pretty close to going down myself.  Also, it was pretty obvious that I had a flat because someone yelled it out to the whole pack so maybe you shouldn't ride behind me when you hear that? 

I've never taken a free lap before, and I just sort of lost my rhythm afterwards.  I was working my way back up to the front, but this girl got a flat right in front of me and cut me off with 1 lap to go and I just couldn't catch back up to the front.  I was feeling great.  My pack riding skills just suck.  In my opinion, this doesn't bode well for my future in bike racing, but we'll see.  

I'm frustrated and disappointed with myself for not being able to improve my pack riding skills.  Now I have 2 more exams and I'll be done with undergrad.  What do I do with my life??

Oh Legs...

Please recover quickly.  

I think I did too much earlier this week.  I still have time to recover, but I have been deeply fatigued for the last few days.  I've been sleeping 9-10 hours a night and still taking tons of naps during the day.  I'm pretty unproductive as far as studying goes.  But no one cares if I end up with a 3.83 or a 3.87 do they?

Tuesday I rode 35 miles easy by myself (averaged 16.5...), and yesterday I intended to do a 20 mile ride, but I turned around early and only did 7.5.  Today will be off and tomorrow I'll do my typical pre-race ride.  Hopefully this will be enough time to recover for Saturday and Sunday.  I'm a little nervous about it, but I should be fine.

It was also announced that 5 teams qualify for nationals.  We're currently ranked 2nd.  Don't blow it, guys!

I was also excited to find out that my team voted me MVP!  I was pretty sure that this wasn't going to happen because sometimes I get the feeling that the guys don't realize that the women's racing is still hard even if the fields are small.  We're still working our butts off!  It was nice to see that they do acknowledge the work we do.  Thanks! It does mean a lot to me. :)

Race It Like the Rent's Due Tonight

I'm beginning to think that I could be pretty good at this whole bike racing thing.

As you can maybe tell, I don't take it very seriously now.  I don't really follow a training plan.  All I did this winter was ride 4 times a week: CTS sprint video, CTS time trial video, CTS criterium video, and an easy longer ride that I usually shortened or sometimes skipped all together.  You can also probably guess that I used to have a CTS coach.  Now all I do is race on the weekends, do some tempo rides during the week, and let the A guys tow me around at ridiculously fast speeds without doing a single bit of work.

I really want to do this more, though, and I think that if I can improve my bike handling/pack riding skills and just ride more, I can do so much better.  I need to get on a good team, or I need to pull out some serious magic at cycling nationals so that someone recognizes me and hands me bags of money.  

I also learned something this term that seems applicable to cycling.  In my motor control class, for our final exam, one of the questions (which she told us about) requires us to analyze a movement.  I wanted to do something cycling related since it requires a lot of things that we learned about.  I decided to talk about reaching for a water bottle.  This involves reach and grap, proprioception without visual guidance, and the maintenance of postural support with the other hand/the rest of the body.

So we learned in class that proprioception is better developed in the non-dominant hand because you don't watch it as much.  But I always grab for my bottle with my dominant hand.  I always figured that it would be better at this sort of thing, but now I'm starting to rethink this idea, especially since I often fish around for awhile trying to find my bottle.  My right hand is stronger, and I could probably stabilize myself better with it.  I also could shift with it if I needed to unlike the left.  Switching front rings usually isn't very helpful in that context.  My left hand is better at reaching and grasping while I'm not looking.  I tried this today with both hands, and the result was inconclusive. 

FTW

I finally got a win!

The crit at OSU this weekend was pretty small, but it was still fun and a good workout.  There were only about 8 or 9 of us in the field, and it broke up pretty quickly.  Julie and I rode with this OSU girl for awhile.  She kept saying that she didn't care if she got 3rd as long as no one else caught us.  I wasn't too concerned about this frankly because I knew that Julie and I could out-sprint anyone in the field, but I also didn't want to fall into any traps like I have in the past.  I did actually threaten to slash her tires during the next race if the lied to us (in a nice way...haha).

Anyway, Julie wasn't about to let this happen.  During one of the primes, she did some great blocking for me, and I started to get away but the OSU girl caught me.  Later, during another prime, Julie did some more blocking for me, and I got away.  I rode the last 5 laps by myself and was able to hang on for the win.  :)  Julie also got 2nd with a flat tire.  It was a slow leak, so she was able to finish without it going completely flat.

I also heard some other good news today, but I won't say anything about it until it's final because I don't want to get my hopes up too much.  I'm happy with how my racing has been going, though, and I think I settled into a really good racing routine.  I also hit the highest wattage I've ever hit today, which is wonderful since I usually don't get as high on the road as the trainer because my sprinting in the drops is usually a little lacking.  It's improving, though.

Better

It's become fairly obvious to me that people are angry with my decision to not do nationals.  I'm also beginning to understand, however, that it doesn't matter what other people think about this; they don't know how much it hurts, and they don't know what really went into my decision.  They don't have to like me, and they don't have to believe me.  That's perfectly fine with me because I know that I made the right decision.

I wanted to do triathlon nationals.  I wanted it to be my last hurrah in the triathlon world before embarking on the life of a roadie.  In February, my training was on track, and I felt like I was setting myself up for a great race.  But then I got busy bike racing, and then I got injured.  I'm doing well with cycling this year.  I'm currently ranked #1 in the conference.  I planned to do some last minute, super intense training during these two weeks prior to nats to jump start my system and get back on track for a good race.  The problem is that I cannot do this.  I cannot run or swim.  It may improve in the next week or so, but by then, what's the point?  Why should I waste my efforts on something that I'm not prepared for and will put me in excruciating pain when I can focus on something that I am prepared for?  I had to make a decision quickly so that I could focus my efforts on one thing, not both.

It's true.  I was torn over doing nationals instead of regionals, but I was going to do it anyway for the team and for the experience.  When this injury prevented me from training properly for nationals, it no longer became worth it.  In the mean time, our cycling team is on the brink of qualifying for nationals.  This is something we haven't done in probably 10 years, and it probably won't happen for another few years.  Instead of wasting myself to finish a triathlon that I won't do very well in, I'm going to help my team go to cycling nationals.

Otherwise, training is going well.  Yesterday I lead a "moderate paced" ride which consisted of Kyle and Pete Schilling going really fast for the whole Whitmore Lake loop...I felt good, though, despite not doing any work. Ain't towin. Today I rode about 25 miles in the rain and did about 8x15 second flat sprints.  I shifted into a hard gear, slowed down, and just sprinted as hard as I could.  I'm getting more used to sprinting in the drops, which is good and that was my main objective for the workout. 

Ouch

Ignore what i said in my last post about doing triathlon nationals.  

today i went for a 50 min ride on my TT bike and a 20 min run, and my neck was in a lot of pain afterwards.  the pain is worse than ever, and my shoulder periodically goes numb.

i went to UHS, and i didn't leave with a clear diagnosis.  they took x-rays (which were really blurry and probably not done very well).  he said that there was some degeneration in the back of my neck, which doesn't sound like a good thing, but he didn't seem to be too concerned.  other than that, i signed up for physical therapy.

i'm bummed and i feel so flaky, but i just cannot do triathlon nationals.  i can't imagine how much pain i would be in after a whole race considering how bad it was today.  i didn't even attempt swimming.  

Sketch City

I felt off this weekend at the Marian and Purdue races.  I'm not sure if it was from being tired, nervous, or a combination, but my bike handling just felt off.

The crit on Saturday was super sketchy.  There were 3 crashes during the race, one of which was right in front of me (there are rarely crashes in women's races).  It was also about double the field size of the crits I've done.  Some of the corners were sharp, and I over-braked throughout the whole race but still stayed with the pack (in the back because I was having trouble drafting due to my over-braking).  I got some prime points, and I think I finished near the top 10.  Not too bad considering that my biggest focus was staying upright.  With my neck injury, crashing would not have been good.

Sunday was much better.  I was still feeling a little off and I was having some trouble riding in the pack of about 30 riders, but luckily, it broke up pretty quickly.  It was a short 20 mile race with 5 laps and a big hill on each lap (but we did the hill 6 times).  Someone attacked on the second lap, and I found myself in a 6 person breakaway.  I was feeling pretty good, but I got forced into pulling at the bottom of the hill.  A Wisconsin girl accelerated in the middle of the hill, and I gave her too much of a gap.  I started accelerating towards the top and I was really gaining on her, but the finish line came up too quickly.  I shouldn't complain about 2nd place, but the more I think about it, the more it eats away at me.  So close!

I'm still torn over triathlon nationals vs. cycling regionals, but I made my decision to do tri nats.  It's still eating away at me, along with my 2nd place finish.  Oh how it stings.

The Fatigue

I'm starting to feel the fatigue of racing every weekend.  

 I've had trouble balancing my bike racing with my triathlon training.  It's always been obvious to me that if I really want to be good, I have to choose one or the other.  This is becoming even more obvious.  I'm still pretty sore from that track workout on Tuesday.  My neck is also hurting from riding and running but mostly running I think, and my legs are feeling pretty dead.  I'm a little nervous for the weekend, but sometimes it seems like I race better and find this magical power when my legs are tired (like last Sunday).  I was still able to hold the same power in my pre-race ride I did today as last week (4x[1:00 @300 watts, 20 seconds at 375-400, 10 seconds max sprint]).  And truthfully, I think it's all because of the Espresso Love GUs that pretty much save my life in every race (sorry Powerbar).  

Anyway, this all creates a bit of a dilemma.  Right now, it's also obvious that I'm in much better bike racing shape than triathlon shape.  Collegiate triathlon nationals and cycling regionals conflict with one another.  I'm planning on doing tri nats, but if my neck keeps hurting the way it is, I may be more inclined to try my luck at cycling regionals and improve our chances of qualifying a whole team to cycling nationals.  This is risky, though, because I'm already qualified for cycling nats, and the men's A team would really have to pull it together to qualify since the competition is pretty stiff.  Even with our huge point collection last week, it might not be enough.  Plus, I don't want to abandon the tri club since I'm our #1 seed.

I want to do tri nats to race with the team and mainly for the experience, but my future lies in cycling (I've been looking at cycling teams out in Seattle, not triathlons).  I've always sort of known that tri nats would be my last triathlon for awhile, and I was hoping that I could  put everything together just once to race really well (like 2:15).  With my lack of running and swimming, though, I don't know if that's possible.  But if I skipped it, I might always wonder "what if?"  I also have to remind myself that I did fairly well at tri nats last year without training much at all, and I'm definitely faster now.  I just want to lay down one of the fastest bike splits.  Hopefully the Espresso Love will pull me through the run.

A New Use for Zip Ties

Today I rode my bike to Whitmore Lake High School, which is probably about 8 miles away.  Then I did 8x400s on the track, and rode home.  I intended to do 3 minute power intervals on the way out and the way back, but since there were 35 mph crosswinds, I decided to just ride as hard as I could so that I could put a steady force against the wind.

I did encounter another problem, though.  How do I transport my running shoes?  I thought of using my cycling vest pockets, but with my size 11 feet, that did not work.  Then I thought of using a carabiner, but I couldn't find one.  Finally, I settled on using zip ties.  I had to bring some clippers and extra zip ties for the way home, but it seemed to work pretty well.  

Overall, the workout went pretty well.  I currently can't upload my powertap data because my uplink is broken and the new one hasn't come, but I probably averaged well over 200 watts on the bike.  For the 400s, I did them all in about 90-93 with less than 1 minute recover.  I was surprised with this because in recent weeks, I haven't been running more than a total of about 3 miles.